“…when a person sends a mismatched message–where nonverbal and verbal messages are incongruent—recipients almost always believe the predominant nonverbal message over the verbal one.”
“In other words, how we say something is more impactful than what we say.” by Jacquelyn Smith
See on Scoop.it – Story Selling
The article is focused on helping to build confidence at work. However, any time we are actively listening to another person, we demonstrate many of the same non-verbal clues.
Such as good eye contact, effective gestures, how we stand/sit, facial expressions, using appropriate voice tone, responding to the other persons emotions, and providing our full attention. This is 7 out of the 10 Jacquelyn discusses.
In Story Selling, the whole purpose of sharing a relevant story with a prospect/customer is to receive their story. This is where our skills in active listening need to take over. Many of which are non-verbal.
One could say the art of story tending is 90% non-verbal and only 10% around the types of questions we may need to ask. All of which are seeking to understand, not to position our product/service around a need while we are tending their story.
As with all non-verbal clues, the customer will know if you are there to help them, or your self.